The goal of any Christian couple is to honor God, in their process of dating. You do that by protecting each other’s purity for the purpose of honoring God and each other. If you’re wondering if traveling with your boyfriend on a vacation is a good idea, Well, the answer to that question depends entirely on the boundaries and measures you have put in place to protect each other. However we suggest, this…
As a Christian couple, it is not advisable to do a vacation together especially if it’s just the two of you. It doesn’t matter how strong you think you are, it’s a bad idea. We recommend, if you must do a vacation, consider having a group vacation, which can be with family or even with close friends.
This will help you keep to your commitment of boundaries and at least have someone to keep you accountable. In the next 5 minutes, as you read this article, I request you to be open-minded and hear me out on this. I, however, believe that we are all different and our situation is also different. The opinion given here is from our years of coaching and mentoring young couples. We suggest you evaluate your relationship and faith to figure out what works best for the two of you.
Here is our advice to you.
Flee From temptation
I remember when my wife and I were dating, how even holding hands or driving in the same car would spark some crazy feelings and creative ideas. Imagining a vacation together…Hmmm.. Even for a pastor like me, I don’t think I would survive the spark, the temptation, and the strong desire of cuddling and doing some unwise things. You know what I mean…
To be honest, for us we knew that the best way to defeat the desire for sex is to flee from temptations and not put ourselves in a compromising situation. Just like the old saying better safe than sorry. We had this long conversation one evening and decide to set some clear boundaries and rules of engagements. We are now enjoying marriage and traveling all over having fun. It was worth the wait. Okay, let’s go to the next one. Hope you’re taking notes.
People don’t just fall, they drift
Have you ever heard of the saying “it’s a slow fade”?
Yes, falling into sin is not something that just happens as most people say, it’s a slow fade. Especially sexual sin, let no one fool you, sexual sin is an intentional sin.
The devil is a liar, cunning and, his agenda is to distract you from pursuing God. He does this by giving you false confidence about sexual desires. The lie goes something like this! “you are strong, you can do this, we are not like some other couples, we will just sleep and not do anything” Isa lie. It’s a slow fade and by the time you notice, it will be too late.
It’s okay to feel like you’re strong, but sin is just sin, and playing with fire will get you burnt. I know you have a plan, and maybe you have done this before and nothing happened, but I guarantee you that the enemy is up to something and if you keep playing he will eventually get you.
How will you know that you are drifting away from your boundaries?
- If you no longer feel guilty about some things.
- When you keep going back to the same cycle of sin. You repent you sin you repent and the cycle continues
- When you keep playing on the edge
- When you convince each other it’s okay when you know it’s not
- When you feel the conviction of the Holy Spirit
Protect your reputation
As you watch out your life not to fall into sin remember that other younger couples are watching you, admire you, and for some, you are their role model. Living your life with that reality will keep you out of trouble. As you think about going on vacation with your boyfriend, think about those younger girls that are looking up to you.
What will they say about you and your relationship if they know you went on an overnight with your boyfriend? Don’t mess up your reputation because of one weekend that can be avoided. Remember perception kills many relationships in our generation, do the right thing and you will get there safe.
Think about future
Dating is not just for fun, especially if you’re a Christian couple, we strongly suggest- just date the right way. Wait until you get married to do sleepovers, vacations, night out but of course, you can do them in the context of a group, but if he wants you to do it just the two of you, it’s not worth it.
Okay, let me share with you the benefits of waiting. Why should you wait until marriage for the two of you to do a vocation alone, travel together?
- It’s more fun when you are married.
- You will go all out
- You will not be afraid to mess up.
- Sex will be amazing
- You will fee free to enjoy and take photos
- No guilt
Your body is not saved
When my girlfriend and I were dating a couple of years ago, I remember our mentor used to tell us that, your body is not saved, when exposed to certain body parts it reacts hehe. So take care of yourself, flee from temptation, and protect each other.
Make it a mission to avoid things that sexual puts you in a compromising state. Set boundaries and communicate them well. Have accountability partners and mentor couples to help you navigate such situations.
How to travel together with your boyfriend the right way
The safest thing to do is never to travel alone with your boyfriend for a vacation. But if you must do so, these are the three safest way to go about it.
- Travel with friends or family members
- Do a day travel and come back [avoid sleep overs]
- If you find yourself stranded, make sure to book separate rooms. [this is only if your stranded, otherwise we don’t recommend]
In our experience mentoring and advising young couples, we have seen couples make bad choices that have affected their lives and faith.
We always let them know that; at the end of the day it’s your relationship and you need to take responsibility for your relationship and whatever happens.
If you give me a chance to advise you right now, I will tell you this. The safest thing to do to help you honor God with your relationship is to avoid things that will lead you into sin.
Put God first and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you in your dating experience. Watch out some of the silent red flags and things that threaten your relationship with God. Make and communicate boundaries to your partner and don’t compromise no matter what.
Otherwise, enjoy your love life.